Running after the wagon, I’m too slow.
Yes, I want it. I keep asking myself though, if you want it so bad, then why aren’t you fighting hard enough for it. The answer is I don’t know. I fear it maybe. I fear the journey. No, i’m just going through something. I have the opposite of support at home. I have people trying to make me fail. I have to stop using food as a drug of choice. We all need something to lean on right? We are all addicted to something. I am addicted to food. Its been like four days straight. I haven’t gone to the gym, I haven’t worked out. I haven’t ate healthy. I’ve been eating all the wrong shit. Its like I was thrown off the wagon, I didn’t just fall. I flew! Now here I am chasing the wagon down, trying to get back up there and Its like within an inch reach but my arm wont extend that extra inch. Grrr!!!
Last night we didn’t go to the gym because hubby started complaining about not being able to sleep afterwards. He wants to go early, but we made the agreement before signing up that we would go late hours to avoid the crowd. I cannot workout and have to wait 5 minutes for every machine. For that, I would rather have worked out at home. The thing is that we discussed this long ago. He agreed with me and we made a commitment. Now he is altering his side of the commitment. So we fought and fought and nothing came of it. We just didn’t go. I’m not sure if we’ll keep going. I might have to cancel. I don’t know yet. Anyway, after all of this… He goes out and picks me up a pizza. Yeah, the huge ones, same as always. Now me being as depressed and stressed out as I am, I indulge!! I was barely chewing, that’s how fast I was scarfing it down. I felt horrible about it after, but nothing I could do. I just made sure I didn’t eat anything else for the remainder of the day.
I’m scared to weigh myself. I have a strong feeling I gained a lot of weight. I see it in the mirror. God I need to stop it. Wtf am I doing to myself?!?!
Guys, please pray that I break this cycle today. I need to eat healthy and lighten up. I need to lose this weight before I gain it all. ♥
I stopped the wagon. Now jump back on. Only you can do this for yourself but we are all here for you! Good Luck buddy:)
What if you went to the gym without the hubby. You can and will get back on the wagon don’t worry about it. As for the pizza you indulged now forget about it and better your food choices today. You can be depressed about not eating healthy and not exercising or you can do something for yourself. I understand not having support at home. My parents call almost everynight for pizza or poutine etc and my hubby drink coke all day everyday and eat chips for breakfast that’s why I came to this website, lean on us for support and we will be here for you. Hope you have a better day today.
Mel - grab my hand - you ready? Let’s do this!!!!!!! I don’t care if you go for a walk! I don’t care if you have to rent or buy a DVD to do some resistance trainig - go out there and do it!
I love you but no MORE PIZZA! The next time you order pizza, you better march to the store and get a huge salad to eat before diving in!!!
LOVE YA!! COME ON MEL! PULL OUT OF IT!!!
You are more then capable of getting back on the wagon…dont think that its far gone…i fell off the wagon before i joined this website and I got back on and its even better than before!..Dont think about what has happened…think about what you do from now on..start with a new clean slate..an if your husband doesnt wanna go to the gym..go without him..you have to do this for yourself. =)
I’m standing in front of the wagon holding it steady.. jump on!! No more pizza, and who cares if hubby goes with you.. get your butt in that gym!! If you really can’t go without him, grab a DVD and sweat your hiney off!! You CAN do this, and I know you will! Come on Mel!! Get to it!!
C’mon girl and I agree with Nic, go without him! Or do like I do and sweat out at home. You can do it
Sounds like Hubby doesn’t want a hot sexy mama because he’s afraid he won’t have you all to himself. Just a thought - I have a sabbatoger like that. Remember whom you are doing this for. YOU! Leave him home, and eventually he’ll be running behind you trying to keep up. And don’t beat yourself up…just move on. Today is another day - a new beginning.
I agree with everyone! GIRL GO!! go to that gym alone like i do. go to the park/lake.. whatever you have to do. then when he see’s you, he will be like “I can’t let you go there alone”, lol. My hubby can and would eat cookies and all night and have something smart to say about me in the gym.. WHATEVER!! this is for me, and he can enjoy it if he wants.
while i am talking to you.. i am talking to myself, cause i need motivation too.
Aww! He better stick to his side of the bargain! I just wrote to Deb that it was like this with my ex. He would be all for doing this with me or supporting me, whatev. Then he would want to go out to eat or something ALL the time. It really is so much easier to do this when you live alone. I feel for all you people who are having to face the temptations everyday! You can do it girl, you have done so well in the past, I know you can get back on — so hop back up, we are all reaching for you so you wont miss it! Tomorrow is a NEW day so use it how you know how! Be strong
Mel, YOU CAN DO IT. Remember how good you felt when you were on your streak? Where did that Mel go?! Come on girl, I know you want to feel sexy and confident, so DO it!!! Get your ass back on the wagon! YOU CAN DO IT. I know you can. I got your back, girl!! : )
Oh I feel your pain right now…Im right there with you…chasing that damn wagon that I flung myself off of. Its not easy but we have to keep going…keep fighting…even if we are the only one fighting against the temptations around us. You can do it…we can do it!
I see that this is your blog from yesterday & I’m hoping that today is a better day! You did great with the eating yesterday, but now it’s time to kick it into gear and march into that gym! Time waits for no one and before you know it summer will be here & you missy will be looking FIERCE lol.